the ties that bind (part 1)

last sunday i met with my brother, the eldest in the brood of three (i'm the youngest). we we're to meet our uncle at the airport and treat him to some goodtime (great food and some beer, that is) before he flies back to the US.

 

and so we took our uncle to baywalk, roxas boulevard, had dinner, a little chat, and drove him back to the airport in time for his flight to LA.

 

as we left the airport, the conversation was fast-paced --  how's dad? how's mom? how's mama (our lola)? how are the kids? wife? girlfriend? business? work? new places you've been to? what's our plan for christmas? new year?...

 

by the time he dropped me off a mall in makati, we covered enough topics and got enough updates to last us till our next meeting, which would probably be next year.

 

i consider it a rare occassion just getting the chance to see him, however brief each occassion may be. he was the first to leave the nest, so to say, when he entered the seminary for highschool in 1984. since then, i only get to see him about twice a year. he now lives with his family in batangas, running a poultry business while working as a medical representative.

 

in 1985, my sister stayed in a dormitory during her highschool years, and goes home only during weekends. i began to see so little of her when she entered a nursing school in iloilo (central philippines), where she also stayed in a dormitory. the rigorous nursing curricullum forced her to spend her weekends in the school premises, doing volunteer work and getting more training. she briefly worked in manila after graduation, and flew to liverpool, UK, where she now lives with her own family (and where it's beatlemania all year round. yeah!).

 

my entire highschool and college life was also spent in boarding houses and dormitories. when i graduated college in 1995, our parents (after a BIG sigh of relief) decided to spend their time pursuing their own dreams. i can still remember, a week after my graduation, when they asked me if i still want my usual allowance. i made a big mistake of saying no (stoofid me! what the f*** was i thinking then!), and had to dig in deep into my savings (and into some of my friends', too) until i found a job. (hmmm, i wonder what my bro and sis answered to that question.) but hey i love them, and i appreciate them for letting me dive into deep waters on my own early on. i have absolute faith that they will be there for me should i need help.

 

my father is an intelligent and charismatic batangueno with dreams of running his own poultry farm in his hometown. but to be with his family in aklan, he had to work as a public school teacher. when i graduated from college, he retired from teaching and went home to make his dreams come true. i admire him for his courage and determination to be a good husband and father as he endured the hardships, trials, and challenges of living in a culture that's far different from his own (i say to you, tagalog men don't mix well with visayan culture. no siree, not at all). he is now living his dreams, and sharing all the good things he learned from visayas with his community. for instance, he started and established their annual new year's "bayle" (aklanon for ballroom dancing), which eventually lead to the barangay's move to change their fiesta from May 30 to December 31 -- exactly like the one we have in aklan.

 

my mother is a feisty aklanon, with dreams of taking public service, though education, to its fullest and highest level of integrity possible in the corruption-ridden system. she is an assistant schools division superintendent, with credentials and qualifications that belie her age. her unshakeable commitment to integrity made her target of dirty politicians seeking control of the system, as they had done easily to her predecessors. her ultimate dream is to be the mayor of her hometown, and so my daily prayer includes that she stay safe amid the culture envy and corruption that surrounds smalltown politics.

 

i give thanks to emails and SMS -- at least we get to stay in touch and talk about where, and how, to celebrate this christmas and new year -- even if we're not together, as always.  ^_^;