September 17, 2004

stay tuned

what do you do when you find someone who doesn't want to be found?
 
it was by sheer chance that i saw her name and picture in my friendster network. it's been years since i last heard any news about her, more so the last time i saw her.
 
she was once part of our team way back in my early years with the office. back then, the office was young and in a perennial struggle to stay afloat, and thus work was much more demanding and harsh than it is now. back then, we're the leanest, meanest, overworked and underpaid team of slaves the office has ever had (we still are, i guess *uboubo*). it was in those dire times that the best of teamworks were born, and the bonds of friendship were tempered. we were the miracle workers.
 
i have nothing against people moving on, but i find it so saddening for anyone to entirely cut off ties, specially when the series of events that made her leave the office with a heavy heart were not, in any way, the team's fault. we searched high and low for ways to get in touch with her, but even her family helped in covering her tracks from us.
 
she doesn't want to be found -- that's simple enough a message for me to understand, and after some time i stopped wondering and tossed all my questions to the wind.
 
everyone has good reasons for their own actions.
 
back to friendster...
 
it's been years since i last saw her, and the photos in her friendster page show the same smile and laughing eyes that hint the slightest touch of mischief that i remember so well. i clicked on "send a message", and was about to type a stream of hellos and kumustas with genuine happiness bursting in my chest, when it occured to me: this person doesn't want us to find her.
 
i wonder what others would have done, if they're in my situation?
 
ah! it's not everyday that you find a long, lost friend, even if she might not even consider you as one anymore. so i let everything out of my chest -- without thought and with all honesty -- all the stream of hellos and kumustas, all the happiness i feel for having "found" her.
 
i wonder what happens next...
 
whether or not she responds, i will know how much has changed after all these years.

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