July 07, 2004

of rain and reminders...

it was in january 31, 2001 when i wrote "personal webpage" in "my things to do/have" list. it ranked just below "digital camera" and above "flatbed scanner" (originally it was "own car", but i scratched it out and wrote it next to "own house"). in march 15, 2001, warped gaia was posted. just a test, i thought then, of what i can do online.
 
the webpage turned out to be more that i expected. with it i learned new skills and discovered the joys of recreating the world as i see it in words, forms, motions, and colors. it was a recreation of my being -- online. it felt good. it was intoxicating. it matched my every mood, thought, and emotion...
 
i abused it.
 
having lost the time to channel my thoughts through pen and paper, the webpage became refuge to my deepest and darkest emotions. it became a dumping ground of all my angst and frustrations, among other things that eventually made warped gaia unfit for sharing. in august 15, 2003, i deleted it...
 
it was at its darkest.
 
almost a year after and here i am again, finding escape, survival, and solace in these pages. i can never tell how dark it will get, but i comfort myself that there will also be brighter things.
 
thanks for bringing in the sunshine, rain. Ü

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